All the feels

It has been quite a week around here. So much "life" (and all that that entails) packed in to a few short days. The highs and the lows. The joys and the sorrows. I've shed so many different kinds of tears that I've nearly lost count.

I started the week with a funeral. Anna and I went together. That one isn't my story to tell, and not my loss directly, but it was a huge loss for people that I care about and came with with all the emotions of grief and shock and deep sorrow.

We followed funeral day with a tumultuous day for our family. That one's not really mine to tell either, but it was a hard, hard day. Lots of emotions and frustrations coupled with (and stemming from) cramped/out-of-routine living conditions and overtired people with lots of hormonal upheaval (ah, the tween/teen years!) can result in a pretty "impressive" explosion. I think we are still recovering from that one!

Next came the rollercoaster of emotions that you experience when you mark the passage of time. At our house we get a two-for-one on that experience, since two of our kids share a birthday. Our two oldest kiddos turned 18 and 16 last week. I can hardly wrap my brain around that fact. I am the parent of an adult (technically, anyway!). What in the actual heck is going on in the world? I feel like I was 18 not that long ago. Time is so weird like that! (It should be noted that I simultaneously feel 95 when the aches and pains come as I attempt to get out of bed in the morning . . . bursitis sucks and should be reserved for people who are at least 75!). All day I was full of thoughts and memories. I'm so proud of the amazing people that they are (and are still becoming -- aren't we all still becoming who we really are?)! I am so grateful for the opportunity to be their mom. Nothing else in life can compare to that privilege and responsibility! They have taught me so much over the years. Being a mom has grown me more than anything else in life. I tried to ignore the thoughts of all that I have done wrong as their mom and all the ways that I've messed them up, but those kept popping up anyway. I thought of and prayed over their futures and all that they still have ahead of them in life. Both the joys and the challenges. I remembered them as babies and toddlers and preschoolers and "big kids" and tweens. So very many memories! What a day.

Also, Jacob and Lydia were in the play at their school this weekend. After weeks and weeks of rehearsals, showtime was here. I think they were at school from about 7:30am until after 10pm every day this week (with the exception of Wednesday). Seussical was fabulous and they did a great job! I'm always happy when things come to an end, though, and life can settled down a bit again after the craziness of performance week!

The house project has had some stresses and kinks and delays this week and that only added to the general life stress. But it is really starting to come together and it looks great and I'm so excited for it to be finished and to start getting settled in and using our fabulous new space. There is a light at the end of the tunnel and we can do it!

We have some close family friends who are facing some really intense struggles, so not much time passes that I am not thinking of and praying for them and all that they are facing and in the middle of.

Then there was church . . . I pretty much always cry at church!

Life is so hard! And also so wonderful!. So much tension that we are caught between. I am grateful for the highs and the lows and having them all so interwoven. That is what makes life so real and wonderful. As much as the struggles are hard and no one wants them, the joys wouldn't/couldn't be as rich without the other side of the coin. Birthdays. Death. A beautiful sunrise. Illness. The wrinkly forehead of a newborn. A good book. Relational struggles and heartaches. Snuggling up with your child. Physical pain. The first cup of coffee in the morning. Friendship . . . life!

The week ahead holds yet another birthday, a work trip for Kirby and a band trip to NYC for Jacob. So it would seems things won't be settling down much for at least another week (and probably not then either)!

Celebrations

It was a big weekend at our house. We celebrated some birthdays. We had a lovely, very fun birthday dinner at my parent's house to celebrate Kirby's birthday, Sara's birthday and Allie's birthday. I won't give away everyone's ages, but combined they turned 92 . . . which is OLD!

Happy, happy birthday to 3 of my favorite people on the planet. My amazing husband, my sweet baby girl and my what-would-I-do-without-her best friend/sister. I am so very thankful for each of them. They are such blessings in my life, and the lives of so many others as well.

sister love

We don't get to all spend enough time together, so we enjoyed every minute of our Saturday together celebrating!

the birthday "kids"

4 weeks. 4 birthdays!

4 of our 6 kids have had a birthday in the past 4 weeks. That makes for lots of celebrating. Lots of cake. Lots of singing. Lots of birthday punches (51 total, to be exact!). Lots of gifts. Lots of cards. Lots of gratitude for each of their lives.

On March 23rd Jacob turned 17 and Rebekah turned 15.

Then just 5 days later, Anna turned 8.

Today, Joe turns 11.

It's so true what they say. "The days are long, but the years are short!" It is amazing to me at how quickly the years go by. That very first baby that I held in my arms who made me a mama is 17 already. In a year he will be a legal adult. He drives a car (and sometimes a HUGE van) and makes his own plans and very shortly will be moving out of our house. It all comes so fast. I am thrilled with the people each of our kids are becoming, but I miss the littleness of them. Snuggles on the couch aren't quite the same any more. They don't need me the same as they used to. They still need me, but it's so different. I love it and I also miss what used to be.

My favorite thing is watching them develop friendships with each other. They truly love and care about one another. And more and more they enjoy spending time together and are really becoming great friends. It is so wonderful for us to see. Besides the fact that they each love the Lord, nothing makes me happier than seeing them become friends with one another. I love they way they tease and support and annoy and encourage one another. I love seeing them come up with amazingly thoughtful gifts for one another that are so meaningful and special to the person they are giving them too. I love our kiddos and the wonderful people they are becoming!

What the birthday kids are in to these days ::

Jacob (17) ::
football
Ultimate Frisbee
church softball
anything sports-related
hanging out with friends
church
mowing lawns

YoungLife

Rebekah (15) ::
tennis
friends
taking driver's ed

Netflix
social media

Trout Lake Camp
coffee
babysitting

Miranda Sings

perfecting her Miranda Sings impression (it's pretty darn fabulous, if you ask me!)

YoungLife

Catalyst (before school Bible study)

church/youth group

laying in her hammock

babies

Gilmore Girls

Anna (8) ::
gymnastics
friends

biking

being outside

church (her friend Pastor Troy)

drawing

her newly-pierced ears

Joe (11) ::
all things sports
Nerf guns
school patrol -- walking line
reading
Koalas (he is OBSESSED!)
Legos
football/hockey/swimming/baseball
Marvel super heroes (especially Captain America)

biking

Fuller House (Netflix in general!)

being outside

I am so very grateful to have each of them as a part of our family!

5 . . . and Flashback Friday

Our "baby" is 5 today. I'm not sure how that can be possible, but there's no denying it, despite my best efforts. She has brought so much joy and laughter and fun to our lives (and also a fair dose of frustration and irritation) and we are so happy that God saw fit to give her to our family!

She was kicking her little feet and messing with the accuracy of the scale . . . none of our babies have ever tipped a scale at under 8 pounds! ::

Look at that smile. She stole that guys heart instantly! ::

Those sweet little feet ::

At family camp, almost 2 years old ::

Almost 3 years old. Clearly, she's had that spunk for years ::

On her birthday last year wearing her "I'm 4" shirt for the first time (the 3rd Stoll kid to wear it . . . I'll be so sad to "retire" it! Or put it in the "hall of fame" -- which is where Joe says we should put extra special items of clothing. For example, his "corduroy" pants, which no longer have any wale at all. You know, there is wide wale corduroy, narrow wale corduroy . . . well, Joe may be the only person to own "no wale" corduroy pants! They have been his favorites for YEARS and all the "wale" has completely worn off. You have to see them to believe it!) ::

And a current picture of our sweet, funny, sassy, large-vocabulary, thinks-she's-a-teenager girl. We think she's pretty great ::

Happy Birthday to my favorite 5-year-old on earth. Thanks for being such a blessing to those around you. My God be with you this coming year as you learn to love Him more!

Happy Day

It's this guys birthday today. He is our rock and we adore him (and I'm pretty sure we aren't the only ones!). I am continually thankful for him. For what a great husband, dad, son, friend, leader, employee and servant he is. I am so glad he survived being born with a collapsed lung and touch-and-go health for a while there. I can't imagine my life without him by my side!

Happy Birthday Kirb! We love you and are so thankful for you!

Multitude Monday

It's been nearly a month since my last Multitude Monday post. Where on earth did March go? I'm glad to have moved on to April, though, and to finally see signs that spring is here to stay! So, without further ado, here is my continuing Multitude Monday post which is part of a series started years ago on Ann's blog, which is a favorite of mine. If you've never checked it out, do yourself a favor and click on over. She's an amazing, gifted writer, a wonderful friend and an inspiration to so many (not to mention a mother of 6)!

This will be a "best of" list from the past month, since there are about 80 of them.

"One Thousand Gifts"::

3901. Face Time
3904. hugs
3906. the beauty of mountains
3909. running outside without dodging puddles or watching out for ice
3910. Kirbs' laughter
3911. seeing first-hand how fabulous my husband is at his job. So proud!
3912. eating breakfast OUTSIDE
3913. naturally-sourced vitamin D! (yay for California sunshine on the skin of a Minnesota girl in March)
3916. hanging out and laughing with Jen
3920. fabulous people watching
3922. a good book for the plane ride
3923. safe travels
3925. life-long friendships
3926. being home again!
3927. hugging my kids again after being away from them for a week
3928. waking up and hearing the sound of Joe reading books to Anna
3929. sleeping in my own bed
3930. tax return automatically deposited in our checking account
3931. feeling full to almost bursting with love for my family and my life and gratitude to God for it all
3932. my parents and ALL they did so we could get away
3934. running in my own, familiar neighborhood
3936. 15 years of Jacob!
3937. Rebekah a teenager!
3939. introducing my grandma to the game of Spinners
3940. Sara saying "I love you, Marjorie." to my grandma -- I think it's so funny when she uses adults first names (that sometimes I didn't even know she knew!) instead of their other name (mom, dad, grandma, grandmpa, ama, bopbop, GG). She does it every once in a while and it cracks me up every time.
3941. Rebekah baking her own birthday cake
3945. all the people who took the time to tell me how great the kids did playing in church the Sunday we were out of town
3946. Jacob playing his trumpet accompanied by his GREAT grandma -- pretty rare and pretty special. It goes my heart good!
3949. Rebekah playing "I Love to Tell the Story" on the piano while I work
3950. surprise 40th birthday get-together for a friend -- seeing friends I don't get a chance to see very often
3953. my favorite green chai (the our local grocery store stopped carrying) from my mom (she found some online!)
3958. Our REI dividend!
3961. 6 years of Anna!
3962. our church
3964. 14 glorious miles run over the weekend
3965. snuggling my nephew :: 4-month-olds have the best, huge, toothless smiles
3966. dinner at my parents house
3967. fabulous finds at Goodwill (and a sale to boot!)
3969. Macy's flower show with the littles, my mom and my grandma (4 generations enjoying spring-like flowers inside while the outside was FAR from spring-like!)

stop and smell the hyacinth

Sara wasn't cooperating for pictures!

Anna has lost 2 teeth since this picture was taken less than a week ago!

beautiful

me and my silly little girls

my beautiful grandma

what's a flower show without some candy treats?

GG, Ama and Anna

3970. weeknight sleepover for Sara (makes the morning SO MUCH easier)
3972. one-on-one date with Sara

enjoying a ride at MOA

3973. attending a 100th birthday party (you don't get many chances to do that!)
3975. REALLY dirty kids after playing outside (ahhh, the "joys" of spring)
3977. coffee ice cream
3978. running in capris and a tank top (it's been a long time since I ran sleeveless!)

 May you realize all the blessings the Lord brings your way and take the time to make note of them. (you'll be glad that you did!)

Before-40 goal #2

Almost exactly a year ago I verbalized two before-40 goals to a friend of mine, while we were out running. My 40th birthday was just over a year away at that point and I wanted to do a couple things before turning 40 that would take dedication and be a bit of a stretch for me. The first thing I mentioned was to run a half marathon. At that point the furthest I'd EVER run in one stretch was about 5 miles. In my head I thought maybe a late spring or early summer half in 2014. But over the summer as I was training for a 10 mile race that I had signed up for for September of 2013, I decided I had enough of the training in as it was and I might as well shoot for a fall race. So sometime in the summer, I signed up for a half marathon for late October 2013. Then I proceeded to freak out a little (or maybe more than a little) and question what I had just done. Fast forward to October 26, 2013 and on a chilly, windy Saturday morning I crossed a half marathon starting line. 2 hours 7 minutes and 37 seconds later I crossed the finish line. Yay! Goal #1. Check!

The second goal I made for myself was to grow my hair out long enough to donate. I had tried once before, but couldn't handle it once it got to a certain length. (cue my frustration with my hair for the past few months now!) But after my mom's cancer diagnosis and two of my daughters donating their hair, I knew I wanted to do it too. (I am SO thankful that my mom didn't need chemo and never lost her beautiful hair, but lots of people DO need chemo and DO lose their hair and I wanted to help.) So, I am starting to think about the end of this long hair! It's pretty much driving me crazy at this point. It bugs me when I'm sleeping (when I try to roll over I can't, because I'm laying on it). I was taking off my shirt one night, getting ready for bed, and my hair got stuck in my armpit. How gross is that! I know there are lots of people with hair longer than mine, but I'm pretty much at my limit. I've had relatively short hair for a good portion of my life. More often short-ish than long-ish, anyway. I'm thinking I'll cut it next month sometime. Or maybe not until June. I'll probably go chin-length or shorter. I want to donate as much hair as I can.

So I have to make a decision (Have I mentioned I'm not really a fan of making decisions? I would rather someone just tell me what to do!) about what style to do with when I chop it all off. As my friend noted at church this morning (Hi Catherine!) I've been pinning short hair dos like crazy on Pinterest lately.

Here are my top few choices (my top few TODAY at least. Tomorrow I may very well change my mind).

I think this one is pretty realistic. It's not TOO styled (I'm a pretty low maintenance girl when it comes to hair. If I have to do too much -- or ANYTHING, really -- to it, it's not going to happen!) and she has thinner hair, as do I ::

I like this one too, but I think it looks like it might take more work than I am willing to put in ::

I think that, right at this moment, this one is my favorite. (Although that may just be because she's wearing gray and I LOVE gray!) I think her hair is a little thicker than mine, so I'm not sure I could pull it off. Also, I'm not so good at the nondescript-part-thing, my part is usually pretty defined. But, still, at this point this one is my favorite. That may change tomorrow, but for now, I think this is the direction I'm leaning ::

What do you think? Any preference? Are they all bad? All good? In the end I'll probably just tell Jill (my VERY talented friend who cuts my hair) to do whatever she wants! I like it better that way. She's never done me wrong and I get out of making the actual decision! Yay!

Have you ever had a bucket list or things you wanted to do before a certain age or at a certain time in your life? How'd it go for you? 

Flashback Friday

Guess what today is?

It's someone's birthday!

Enjoy Anna-through-the-years ::

Anna at just a few days old :: 2008

Anna at 1 :: 2009

I can't believe our sweet Anna Grace is 6.

Anna at 2 :: 2010

Anna at 3 :: 2011

The year of the (short-lived) curls :: 2012

Anna turns 5 :: 2013

Happy 6th birthday, to our sweet girl, Anna. We love her lots and her spunky spirit. She adds snuggles, love, humor and fun to our family.

(Hi Robin!)

And here are a few more Anna favorites that I couldn't resist. Enjoy ::

 

How on earth?

We had a big day around here over the weekend. It was our "twins" birthday. Jacob and Rebekah are exactly 2 years apart (within about an hour of time of day, too). They were due in different months, even, but we born on the same day. Jacob gave me a bit of high blood pressure that had the doctors worried and so they induced me early (he was due April 2nd). Rebekah was having a dandy time hanging out in my womb and saw no reason to leave, so finally when I was 6 days overdue and at the doctor for a check up, they insisted I come in the next morning to be induced -- which happened to be the 2nd birthday of my only other child. I wasn't super excited about them sharing a birthday (and cried about it in bed that night -- surprising, I know! Me. Crying?), but in the end it's kind of a fun thing for them to share a birthday. And it's good they didn't wait any longer to get Rebekah out of there, since she was over 10 pounds as it was. I hate to think what another day or two or three of "cooking" might have done to her! Yikes.

Jacob (3 or 4 months) and Daddy

Rebekah, almost 4 months

how sweet is that . . . holding hands

Jacob on St. Patty's Day in preschool (age 3)

Jacob (6 months or so) hanging out with his favorite college football player/uncle!

summer 2011

Rebekah (age 4) and her BopBop

eating pickles together at the state fair

first day of school :: 2nd grade and kindergarten

New Year's Eve 2012

right before Rebekah got all her hair cut off and donated it :: November 2012

Jacob and his mom

Rebekah made and decorated the cake with the candles (the 15 for Jacob and the 13 pink ones for herself), but since Jacob couldn't eat it Kirby whipped up another cake at the last minute so both birthday kids could enjoy some birthday cake on their big day!

the birthday "twins"